blind and stab

My lovely new apartment borders a not-so-lovely section of Baltimore. Knowing there will be times I’ll have to park in a rather unsavory spot at night, my boyfriend lent me “the defender”. While I will not give away all tricks of my new weapon, I will say its main uses are for blinding and stabbing. In order to make sure I fully commanded the use of it, boyfriend (Matt) and I practiced using it against each other on the street.

Matt went first. I shuffled near him, pretending to be an attacker, and he flashed the defender in my eyes. While temporarily blinded, he pantomimed stabbing me, to show how easy it would be. After I’d gotten my sight back, it was my turn.

Matt oh-so-casually leaned against a nearby car like a gangster, and when I approached, he straightened and started walking towards me. In all the excitement, I forgot he wasn’t really an attacker, and my adrenaline kicked in. I leapt forward, thrusting the defender in his face, blinding him for much longer than necessary. I moved into a crouch, waving the defender slowly back and forth, searching for weakness. Before he could react, I came forward fast and hard to drive him back with a dazzling succession of parries, quick lunges, and sidesteps. He tried deflecting to break my rhythm, but I flicked my arm out of the way, lunging with the defender. I scored a direct hit, then parried, feigning a swing, and instead of connecting, struck his other arm aside with a decisive downward blow. We both retreated a step and circled one another warily.

NOTE: None of that happened. I’ve been reading too much RA Salvatore (oh, how I love RA Salvatore and Drizzt Do’Urden, the DROW elf); I did blind Matt for a few seconds too long, but that was it. However, this seemed like just the right post for me to try my hand at writing a little fight scene.

The defender is great. I absolutely feel better with it in hand, and while I hope I won’t have the opportunity to use it, I fully intend to blind and stab anyone who dares approach me in a slightly menacing manner. In fact, watch out even if you approach in a friendly manner. Actually, to be safe, don’t approach me at all, especially after dark. I’m bound to think you’re a predator.


ps. read this awesome interview with RA Salvatore, titled “How to Write a Damn Good Fight Scene”, in which he credits The Princess Bride with helping to inspire more intricate and detailed fight scenes in fantasy books.


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