The Israeli Men

On Isla Mujeres, there were many attractive men. We creepily eyed them during our frequent escapades for food- whether sneakily behind a book or blatantly depending on the level of attractiveness. I learned to gauge what sort of man was just beyond my field of vision based on the shiftiness of Katie’s eyes.

While Katie was taking a nap one afternoon, I decided to wander out for a walk, and happened to come across one such gentleman and his friend. Let’s call them the lovely one and the skeevy one. The lovely one had smoldering blue eyes.

Like this, only with short hair. Sort of.

I kept running into them everywhere. Even when I went back into our hotel room and went out onto the balcony, I saw them walking by. It was destiny we would run into them again.

That evening, when we happened to be wandering the ‘avenue’ on Isla, a crowd of break dancers with drums gathered a small crowd. In the midst of this, we saw these two gentlemen sitting at one of the tables on the street. They called over to us, and we ended up sitting down with them for a few pitchers of mojitos. The conversation, sadly, was a bit lacking. The initial attractiveness of the lovely one wore off as the conversation revealed they were two Israeli man sluts intent on throwing every line in the book at us.

The stories from their military service came first, with the classic ‘he saved my life’ line, then the toast to ‘good sex’, then an invite to a party on the beach, where they tried to pair us off for intimate conversations about their business success and real estate development. It was time to go back to the hotel when the one skeevy friend decided to get handsy, and Katie told them it was past our bedtime. When we were in our room, they were still yelling up from the street asking us to come with them to another beach party. When we declined, the lovely one seemed out of sorts while the skeevy one tried to drag him away. Several hours later, in the dead of night, we heard yelling again from the street (same guys). This time we ignored them.

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