Today we would like to discuss dating. Or, more specifically, men who ask you to do something with them in an ambiguous way. Is it a date? Is it a friend date? If you don’t go, will they take offense in a she-doesn’t-want-to-date-me way?
Gentlemen, if you want to ask a lady on a date, ask her on a date. Do not ask her to hang out in such a way that is unclear whether or not it is a date. We understand it takes balls to ask someone out. It’s scary and they might not accept, which can be embarrassing. Do it anyway. If you ask a female friend/love interest to do something casual, like grab drinks, there is a decent chance she won’t realize it’s actually a date. She may or may not have accepted, knowing it was a date, but if she does, you won’t face the potentially awful situation of attempting a goodnight kiss and having her leap back in surprise. We think some men ask for dates in this vague manner as a way of saving face – if she accepts, it’s a date, but if she declines, you can pretend it was just a friend thing anyway and doesn’t matter.
Do men always have to do the asking? No, they certainly don’t. There are plenty of women, braver than I, who have no qualms about going after a lovely gentleman. However, nothing is more attractive, and gives you more chance of a woman saying yes, than a man who goes after what he wants. A woman who might have said ‘no’ to an ambiguous “date” might just say ‘yes’ to the man who was confident enough to ask her out in the first place.